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Rising Up: My top 5 posts of 2005

December 06, 2023

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Rising Up: My top 5 posts of 2005

XOXO

P.S. it's been almost twenty years since I posted here????? Really??

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On your life and times

Well, that whole thing with my folder was pretty .... unexpected. Very Junior High. I think I liked it. Just like your calls and your assertion that with your other friends 'you don't talk about these things'. Does all this have to do with the way 'I get you'? I've told you several times that we are very similar in many aspects. Skin tone and years apart, we kind or resemble each other. I understand your motivations, machinations and desires because I've felt and done them, too. Our worlds babyboy, are very similar. And that takes me to your insistence in my telling you what 'your world' is about, or at least how I see it. You see, that's the first part of this whole chain of events. Once I explain to you how I see this world of yours, it all becomes real, tangible, something you can taste and savor to your heart's content and then either adapt, adopt or discard. Like most everything that is touching your life at this point. You see, y...

Boy, interrupted...?

That was weird. What was that on the phonetoday? Seriously, I don't know if it was because I was the 'he' whose words you did not care to analyze but that somehow got to you or if was a leftover of your not gettting what you wanted with someone else -an emotional tantrum, baby boy?- or was it just plain ennui? But it was weird. I thought we were beyond that. After all, I'm an intimate stranger, a digging but passing acquaintance, a closer-than-most unknown. I've heard you snore, I've washed you up, I've tasted you. I've written the unsaid. You don't need to pose or resort to innuendo with me. If you're mad/upset, just tell me. And yes, it is your space, meant for your musings, but when you let me in you knew what was coming, like me when I was giving you directions to my house at three in the morning and you played being one of those boy-was-I-drunk-last-night men we sometimes cross paths with. You have an open forum to your mind and you should t...

Spit or swallow?

Oh, gosh. That was something. Maybe a signal form heavens? The whole scene was total madness. I think I remembered why I keep forgetting to go to the 'belt on Mondays. Or ever, for that matter. It bores me. I'm so over the whole thing -the drama, the drag queens, the fashionistas, the lurkers- that is not even funny. But I think I enjoyed seeing you and your friends. Didn't enjoy the feeling of being the log you were grasping to desperately in the chopped sea that was your mind, though. The whole thing about your friends backstabbing you was beyond absurd. Your worst fears confirmed. The self-fullfilled prophecy you've been talking about for weeks. But hopefully, you'll recover. The crush will be replaced and the friendship will be patched -that is, if it's worth it- and things will just keep rolling. It was so bad, though that you had to swallow your pride and go on with the gifts and the cards. That kind of made me a little mad. You spending time and money...

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